“Blessed is the one who is not offended by me” (Matthew 11:6).
PEOPLE (ESPECIALLY CHRIST PEOPLE) get offended WAY too easily. We look upon those who intentionally offend others as rude and uncaring, even “breathing threats and murder against the disciples of the Lord” (Acts 9:1). And to be offended when we have been violated in some way is considered merely human, totally understandable, simply a natural response to others who act badly.
The ethics of the Kingdom of God are often contrary to our natural inclinations. It has recently occurred to me that it is far more “un-Christ-like” to be one who is offended than to offend others.
Jesus denounced people as hypocrites, got angry, turned over tables, and drove people out of the temple with a bullwhip. He called people snakes, white-washed tombs, and sons of the devil. He even had a couple of nicknames—“Stone of Stumbling” and “Rock of Offense” (1 Peter 2:8). Apparently, there were quite a few who got their feelings hurt. Jesus said to them, However, Jesus said, “Blessed is the one who is not offended by me” (Matthew 11:6). Far from being the great peacemaker, He seemed to continually and intentionally people insult their standard of discipleship.
But was there not a point at which Jesus was himself offended? Was it when they rejected His teaching and refused to believe His words? Maybe it was when people lied about Him and spread terrible rumors. What about when His cousin John was beheaded? How about when one within His own circle betrayed Him or when the others deserted Him? Surely when they beat Him, ripped His flesh with a scourge, or drove a crown of thorns into His head, He was personally offended. But no, He seems to take no personal offense. Even when He was being crucified, Jesus said, “Forgive them for they don’t know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34).
On a personal level, Jesus was completely un-offendable.
My point is that our perceptions about the ethics of the kingdom are in this case (as in many cases) turned upon their heads. Our common expectation is that as we grow closer to Christ, more mature in the faith, more filled and controlled by God’s Spirit, we are less and less likely to offend others. Though we would not care to admit this part, as we grow more and more in knowledge and experience, the list of issues over which we can be offended grows as well.
The truth of spiritual growth as exemplified by the person of Christ seems to be the opposite. As we become more and more like Christ, we will be more likely to offend while at the same time becoming all but unoffendable. We would certainly not offend others from self-centeredness, but would certainly offend more from pure love. I’ve just finished reading again C.S. Lewis’ little book, The Great Divorce. In this tale, people repeatedly turn back from the entrance to heaven because they were, for various reasons, offended by those who spoke to them from pure love.
Not long ago I told a friend who has a long track record of kindness to Linda and me that I intended never to forget it. I continued by saying that were he to do me wrong every day for many years, I would still be on the debtor’s side of our relationship. As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I was reminded of Peter claiming how ready he was to die for Jesus but who denied Him three times before the cock crowed. Without the grace of God, who can tell what they would do before the sun went down.
I don’t want to give the impression that I sit on some high horse. There have been times (far too many times) that I have been offended by the most trivial and insignificant inconvenience and have as a result acted like an ungrateful idiot; like a person without the slightest awareness of his own need for grace or forgiveness. Someone should have asked me at that point how much blood I had shed, how many lashes I had endured, or the years I had spent in prison to have caused me to be so offended. My petty response would have been, “He cut into my lane, they didn’t invite me to their party, she posted an ugly remark about me, I don’t like the way he runs things, or he took my money (err... I mean God's money).” We (myself included) get offended way too easily.
JUSTIFYING OUR OFFENCES
The Amish are known for their peaceful and secluded lifestyle far from the hectic and violent reaches of the modern world. However, one terrible day in September of 2007, their peaceful world was shattered by an unimaginable tragedy. Charles Roberts, a milk truck driver who delivered to the Amish school in Nickel Mines, PA entered the one-room school house, told all the boys to leave, and opened shot 10 girls execution style girls before turning the gun on himself. Five of the elementary and one of the middle school girls died. Law enforcement authorities believe that Roberts was acting out of anger against God for the death of his own daughter nine months before the shooting. In his twisted mind, the shooting made sense. Parents of the victims publicly announced their intent to forgive Roberts for the deaths of their daughters.
Unfortunately, the Amish school in Nickel Mines, PA was only one of many such horrible tragedies.
Then He (Jesus) said to the disciples, “It is impossible that no offenses should come, but woe to him through whom they do come! It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thrown into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones. Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns [to you, saying, ‘I repent,’ you shall forgive him.” And the apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith.”
Luke's account of the Lord's Prayer ends with an additional comment. "And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For if you forgive other people for their offenses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive other people, then your Father will not forgive your offenses (Matthew 6:13-15).
Yikes! A scary thought indeed.
Here is the way I apply that passage (hoping that I am right). Whenever, I am tempted to be take up an an offense against someone, I hear this little voice whispering to me —(sometimes it is an audible voice (i.e., my wife)— "Remember Walter, the measure of grace you show to the one you feel has offended you is the same measure that will be extended to you when you most need it." It's amazing how quickly that thought turns my anger or irritation into grace and mercy.
One of the first steps toward victory and maturity in Christ is ridding ourselves of the thinking that gives place to that same immaturity and offense. If we consider the right to be offended as common, natural, and innocent, then we are very likely to grant it entrance when it comes knocking upon our door. And if we have an open-door policy toward offenses, we are more likely to entertain one as our guest. Pretty soon we begin to harbor the offense, then adopt it, then defend it, and finally become its champion. Before you realize it, you become enslaved to the “root of bitterness that springs up and defiles many” (Hebrews 12:15). Perhaps, this is the lesson the Amish community in Nickel Mines, PA had learned.
If I consider that to be like Christ is to be unoffendable, then I am at least pointed in the right direction, in the position to receive God’s grace.
—Walt Walker
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